YOUNG CHRISTIAN MOM ANSWERS YOUR QUESTIONS ABOUT MOTHERHOOD MOM TALK.

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hello everybody its Delilah and welcome

back to my channel today’s video is

going to be a mom talk I got you guys to

ask me questions over on Instagram which

is where I usually get you guys to ask

me questions so if you’re not following

me over there make sure to go check me

out if you want to be involved in things

like this but I haven’t done one of

these in a very long time so I figured

it’s about time I sat down answered some

questions have a little chat so sit down

maybe have a cup of coffee and let’s

just get into this do you find it hard

to balance caring for your family and

caring for yourself yes you guys know I

work pretty much full-time at home and

I’m also a full-time stay-at-home mom so

I take care of the kids all day long

all night long I cook I clean I do most

of the stuff that was really good about

helping me but I do a lot of it on my

own so it’s very very hard for me to

find time for myself so I was just a

regular stay-at-home mom I would be able

to you know take nap times for myself I

would be able to sit down every once in

a while maybe watch a TV show maybe do

some scrapbooking whatever I would be

able to do that but because I don’t have

that time cuz whenever the kids are

napping I am trying to squeeze in as

much work as I possibly can in the early

mornings at nap time at night like

always just trying to get work done

because I’m doing all of this at once it

is very hard for me to find time for

myself

I do need to make it more of a priority

because caring for myself is actually

caring for my family because if I’m

taking care of myself I am a better mom

to my kids a better wife to my husband

it is something I need to work on how do

you stop tantrums okay this is something

we are kind of I mean we’re always gonna

be working on it but we’re really

working on it right now

when Eloise has a tantrum that is her

expressing her emotions and because

she’s little she’s dealing with all

these big emotions that she just doesn’t

know how to deal with she doesn’t know

what to do with these big emotions how

do we stop the Tantrums our initial

reaction as parents as people is to go

steps up stop trying to just control

their emotions control the reactions

what that’s doing is telling them to

stop expressing

their feelings it’s telling them to

bottle up with their feeling and never

let it out and I don’t think that’s

right it’s tricky though because

obviously screaming and yelling and

throwing yourself on the floor is maybe

not the best way to react to something

so the best thing that we can do I feel

as parents is to demonstrate how to

handle your anger because in those

moments you’re gonna be angry too you’re

gonna be wanting to scream and yell

yourself and I’ve been there I’m guilty

but I think what’s better is to stay

calm to try and calm them down maybe try

to get them to count to count to three

come to ten put them in the room for a

few minutes to have a cool-down period

and then come back to it and then

discuss it and I know in their little

cause like Eloise is only two-and-a-half

years old like she’s not going to

understand fully but it’s never too soon

to start just trying to calm them down

and discuss like what’s a better way to

handle your emotions if any of that made

sense that’s kind of how we try to

handle tantrums do you like to mother

within a firm schedule or just with

inflexible rhythms I like that term

flexible rhythms that is most definitely

what I would say that we do were not

very strict like even when it comes to

bedtimes nap times it’s never very

strict like we’ve never been the parents

that are like okay seven you’re going to

bed right now always as bedtime is

anywhere between eight and sometimes up

to 10 o’clock at night depending on what

we’re doing that evening or theater as

bedtime is anywhere between 6:30 and

8:00 it just really depends and I don’t

like to live my life by a strict

schedule

I feel very restricted then and like we

just can’t go out and do things and so

we like to be a lot more flexible so I

like that term flexible rhythm so we

have kind of routine that we go by every

single day but it’s flexible it’s more

just like a ripple how did you know what

Eloise was ready for potty training so

the first sign and she did this before

she was even 2 she was sleeping through

the night without wetting her diaper

almost every single night she would do

this

and so we knew that was a good sign and

then she started showing interest in the

potty and

I think a couple times she actually

asked to sit on the potty just for no

reason just kind of wanted to sit there

so those are the signs that we knew that

she was probably ready to start potty

training at that time Zach was actually

home he was laid off and Theodore was a

newborn and so we were like you know

what why not just try it

zach is home right now he’s able to help

me out I don’t have to do it all by

myself so let’s just see what happens

and we had a rocky start because

honestly we didn’t know what we were

doing but we learned along the way and

she was potty-trained in no time I do

not get frustrated at the kiddos I’m

really struggling to stay patient lately

I feel you I understand I am in the same

boat every single day especially

recently ouais has really been pushing

those buttons honestly I cannot do it on

my own I have the help of my Heavenly

Father I can go to him I can pray I can

ask him to give me patience and he will

I look at myself from when I first

started parenting when Eloise was first

born to now and I can see so much growth

and I know that it’s not because of me

it is because of my Lord and Savior

Jesus Christ he is gracious and he

forgives and he gives me the patience

that I need I will forever struggle with

it it is not an easy thing to be patient

especially when you’re toddlers know the

exact buttons to press to get you going

I’ve gotten a lot better than I was it

just takes a lot of Prayer and a lot of

practice how did you deal with your

depression after Eloise I don’t think I

was depressed I think it was more a very

severe baby blues if that makes sense

I was never diagnosed with it but

looking back now I can see so clearly

how down I was like it was bad and I was

in a very bad place compared to where I

am now but it’s funny because in that

moment I didn’t see it I knew for a

short while for the first like four

months of her life that I was not okay

but honestly it’s all just kind of a

blur I can’t even really tell you how I

dealt with it because things just kind

of slowly got better I started getting

into the word more I started leaning

more on Christ doing my devotions more

regularly and having that

connecting with other moms in person not

just online you need to connect

face-to-face with other Mama’s who are

going through the same thing paying

attention in church and getting to know

my church family more being open and

honest about things just even talking to

my mom my mother-in-law it was so

helpful to just talk to other people who

have been through the same thing for

experiencing what you’re experiencing

and just trusting that it will get

better eventually it will get better

it’s just so hard to remember that in

the moment what’s your biggest piece of

advice for young moms to be love your

videos thank you my biggest piece of

advice is try not to worry and I know

that is so much easier said than done

especially as first-time moms like I was

stuck to worrywart as a first-time mom

the nurses were telling me I had to keep

track of every single feeding every

single poop how much I Louise Peete how

much you poop they’re telling me to set

my alarms every two to three hours to

wake her up at night and honestly just

don’t worry about it I know they say it

with good intent and there is reason

behind what they’re saying but honestly

that put me in such a bad place right

off the bat did I actually regret being

so strict about it and caring so much

about it I feel like if I hadn’t cared

so much about every single little detail

I would have been in a much better place

for every stage for newborns when they

start to eat when they start to crawl

toddlers try not to worry let those

little details go your plan on home

schooling your kids or how will you work

with them at home I don’t plan on home

schooling my kids and I know that’s kind

of like the thing that everyone’s doing

right now everyone’s homeschooling their

kids but that is just not for us I do

not feel like I’m cut out to teach I’m

horrible at explaining things I don’t

have the patience for it and I really

think it’d be beneficial for both me and

my kids for them to go to school to see

other people to learn how to be taught

by other people for me I think that’s

really beneficial and so we’re gonna try

and send our kids to the same school

that Zack and I went to we went to a

private Christian school it’s a really

great school so we want to send our kids

there if in the case our kids don’t get

in homeschooling will be the next resort

schools kind of scare me because we’re

Christians and things that are being

taught in public schools these days are

very different from the beliefs that we

have and it scares me and so I don’t

want to send my kids there I would much

rather either homeschool or in the best

case scenario I have them sent to a

private Christian school you ever take

naps and how do you keep your energy up

throughout the day I do not take naps I

couldn’t know if I tried and take me

like at least two hours to actually fall

asleep and by then my kids would be

awake so I just don’t take naps ever and

that’s okay I actually don’t like taking

naps because whenever I actually do I

always wake up feeling worse than I did

when I fell asleep so I don’t take naps

I just try to make sure I’m going to bed

early enough and I try to make sure I

have you know my daily vitamins

everything that my body needs I try to

eat healthy I don’t do that very well

but I try and that’s kind of how I keep

my energy out throughout the day it does

help that Theo is sleep trained now

Eloise has been sleep training for

forever now that my kids are sleeping

pretty much through the night having

energy throughout the day isn’t the

biggest issue how do you think you’ll

know when you’re done having kids

currently struggling with that honestly

I don’t know if I’m ever going to feel

like I’m done right now I feel like I am

so far from being done having kids and

the idea of my next pregnancy my next

two pregnancies being my last ones makes

my heart break and I don’t know what it

is God has just put this like need in me

to have kids and I don’t know if I’m

ever gonna feel like I’m done I really

hope that when the time comes I will

feel that our family is complete but I

really just don’t feel that yet and it

scares me

that I’m never gonna feel like our

family is complete what are you most

afraid of when it comes to being a mom

we’re gonna go a little bit deeper here

my biggest fear about being a mom is

that my way of parenting will come off

of my kids in a bad way that I will make

a big mistake in the way that I parents

and will cause issues for my kids down

the road I fear that I will not be a

good example of a loving Christian mom

and that my kids won’t see Christ in me

and that is scary

as parents we have such a huge influence

on our kids they look up to us so much

we are their biggest role models we are

with them all the time we control

everything they do being a parent is not

something to take lightly

it is not for the faint of heart there

is no right or wrong way to parent there

is no perfect way of parenting but I

fear that I’m doing something wrong so

I’m always doing like regular check-ins

like what can I do to make myself better

what can I do to improve my parenting to

help my kids learn better it’s not only

how I’m parenting it’s how I’m

conducting myself how I’m reacting when

I’m angry how I’m reacting when I’m

frustrated or impatient kids learn by

watching us and how we act is how

they’re gonna act and so Oh parenting is

it’s a scary thing what do you do for

self care and me time something that we

actually started implementing this week

is having one evening a week for Zach

and I to do whatever it is that we want

to do I’m not talking about like doing

things together not a date night I’ll do

what I want to do he does what he wants

to do and so for me last night we

actually did this I just sat down and I

practiced knitting because I’m learning

how to knit I think this is going to be

really beneficial for both of us because

there’s things that he wants to do that

he doesn’t often get the time to do and

there’s things for me like I want to

learn how to knit I want to scrapbook

for Theo he’s over six months old and I

still haven’t even touched his scrapbook

and so there’s there’s little like

crafty things that I really love doing

and for me is a source of self care

having that time as an introvert just

alone in silence just doing something

with my hands it relaxes me so much and

it’s very needed in my life I don’t know

how well this is gonna work but this is

our new goal is to set aside one evening

a week just for ourselves how old were

you when you got pregnant with Eloise

technically I think and I don’t know for

sure but I think it was just before my

20th birthday but I was 20 when I was

pregnant with Eloise I was 21 I had her

so I am a very young mom and I love it

how do you deal with the stay-at-home

mom blues I have a job YouTube is my job

social media is my job I get to create

as my job being able to just do

something with my hands and having it be

my job has been amazing for my mental

health

it is crazy busy and sometimes I wish it

wasn’t so busy but overall I know that I

am so much better off because of it

not that you need to have a job to not

feel they’ll stay at home mom blues but

I would highly highly highly suggest

finding some kind of hobby that you can

do something that you can do with your

time that you absolutely love to do

whether that’s even just meeting other

people connecting with other people or

doing something crafty with your hands

maybe it’s baking maybe it’s gardening I

don’t know whatever you love to do do it

and take time for it like set aside time

to do something that you love to do how

do you handle tantrums and strangers me

looks that accompany them I have learned

to just ignore it let it go it doesn’t

matter who cares what they think it is a

lot easier said than done I mean I’ve

been there I know what it’s like and in

the very beginning I cared even when

Eloise would make a peep in church I’d

be like oh no no no but it’s okay it’s

okay kids are going to be upset they’re

going to cry the best thing that you can

do in those moments when you’re in the

grocery store and your child is

screaming bloody murder because you have

to put them in the car to try your very

best to pretend that they are not there

ignore them completely don’t even look

at them focus only on your child and

your situation handle them the way that

you would at home as best as you can

like obviously you can’t really put a

child and timeout when you’re out

grocery shopping but maybe try like

counting to ten with them distract them

with something maybe sing the ABCs of

them just ignore the other people it

doesn’t matter what they think they can

think whatever they want to think and

I’m just gonna continue doing what I do

how are you really thank you for asking

I’m actually good I’m in a very good

spot in my life right now I am mentally

well I am physically well I love my kids

to pieces my husband is amazing I am in

a very good place especially when I look

back to when Eloise was a baby I am now

in a much better place how do you manage

when both the babies cry at the same

time that’s a tough one that is when I

get to my tipping point that is when it

is the hardest for me to stay calm

especially because Theo has this cry

that is so loud it’s all you can hear

you can’t hear yourself think

and then Eloise still somehow manages to

talk that just by yelling screaming

singing doing whatever she’s doing she

talks a lot and she likes to be the

center of attention so when Theo is

crying and I’m focused on him she is

either yelling or singing or doing

something to Trump whatever Thea was

doing to get my attention and so it’s

just it makes my head hurt a little bit

because there’s so much noise in her

house sometimes I know you wouldn’t

believe

Theo cries he does cry and he cries loud

but the nice thing is when Theo is

crying I almost always know what he

needs and it’s easy to give him what he

needs it’s usually he’s hungry he’s

tired it’s easy to help him it’s just

really hard in those moments to not lose

it that didn’t answer the question at

all in those moments I try very hard to

focus on one thing at a time one child

at a time usually the first thing on my

mind is just making Theo stop crying so

giving him whatever he needs because

nine times out of ten a Louise is

perfectly fine she’s just being noisy

and so I’ll just focus on him first I’ll

look at what he needs and then I’ll Gail

what Eloise needs

how do you deal with parenting advice

that’s not helpful as someone who makes

YouTube videos and is in social media I

get a lot of advice and it’s not that I

don’t appreciate it I really do

appreciate all you mamas who are trying

to help me but I do get a lot of

unhelpful advice when I do get that

whether in person whether in comments

whatever it is it’s best to just nod and

smile

all the time advice

given now I already know when I was the

first time mom the advice that I got was

great because I didn’t know anything but

now I know a lot more I’m still always

learning I’m still always getting

fantastic advice from you and I really

do appreciate it but sometimes the

advice just isn’t helpful and I just not

as smile and just continue on with my

day do you ever get annoyed with how

clean Eloise is I would be lying if I

said no it is very hard as an introvert

and as a busy mom to do anything and to

feel like I am my own person when I have

this other little person constantly

speaking to me constantly asking for my

attention and it’s very hard because I

do not want to deny her the attention

that she needs that is the last thing I

want to do I wanted her to know that I’m

always here for her to be with her to

spend time with her to listen to her but

it is really really hard some days and

this past couple of weeks has been

challenging for me in that sense because

Eloise just refuses to play

independently and no matter what I do to

encourage it

she just won’t do it and I know there’s

maybe things I could have done better in

the beginning when she was a baby to

encourage independent play as a toddler

but at the same time I think that’s just

the way she is it’s just her personality

she just loves spending time with people

and I think I’m hoping it will get

better when Theo is old enough to play

with her when they could start playing

together and I’m hoping a useful one to

play with her brother instead of always

asking for me to play with her not that

I don’t like to play with her not that I

don’t like to spend time with her but it

is very hard for me to just feel like I

have my own space I have a bubble and

when someone is in my bubble for too

long I get annoyed so yes I do get

annoyed that I try to appreciate the

moments and I try to appreciate her for

what she is because she is such a

beautiful funny child and I love her to

pieces

when is baby number three I cannot tell

you how many times I was asked this

question Theo is only six months old we

don’t have an exact time when we

to have another baby but we know we

don’t want them to be too far apart I’ll

leave it at that

how do you deal with a whiny toddler

this is something we have also been

dealing with a lot in the last two weeks

something that we are really really

working on and trying to just like drill

into Eloise’s head is using her manners

every time she starts whining and

repeatedly asking for something we ask

her to use free manners we asked her to

say please and we have to be very

repetitive with it because we know that

she understands it it’s not the first

thing that comes to her mind when she

wants to ask for something so being

diligent and repeating it over and over

and over again eventually she’s going to

get it and there have actually been

quite a few times recently where she

started whining and she realized she

shouldn’t be whining she should be

saying please because when she says

please that’s when she gets what she

wants so she started saying please and

thank you all on her own which is

awesome just being really diligent with

it and demonstrating not being whiny

back to your toddler so not complaining

to your toddler about your toddler me

being patient and me using my manners is

a really great way for Eloise to learn

how to use her manners basically I just

tried to talk to her as I would like her

to talk to me and one day down the road

she’s eventually gonna get it are you

doing anything different with Theo now

to encourage independent play yes and no

I guess I haven’t really consciously

done anything to get him to learn

independent play he’s naturally a more

independent baby and he’s naturally

happy by himself for the most part but

also the fact that Eloise demands so

much of my attention he’s almost forced

to play independently and it’s not all

bad it’s not all good but it’s not all

bad it’s been a lot easier with him

mostly just because he’s just he’s so

easy and he’s just so happy with no

matter what situation he’s in I could

really learn a lesson from him you know

what I’m just gonna turn this because

the son how’d you feel about the age gap

of your children I think it’s perfect

but then again that’s all I’ve ever

known Eloise was just old enough where

she was more independent and she was

able to like walk and do things herself

and she couldn’t really understand when

Theo was in my belly but when he was

here she she reacted to him well and I

know not all kids do that and that’s not

just dependent on age but I do think age

played a part in that

I don’t know I feel like it was a very

good age gap for those of you who don’t

know they are 22 months apart so I got

pregnant with Theo

when Eloise is about one year and one

month old no I think I’m gonna end the

video there because a lot of the

questions are kind of repeats from the

ones that I already answered so thank

you guys so much for asking questions I

hope you enjoy this I hope you come away

from this feeling refreshed and having a

new perspective and maybe learning a

little bit along the way as well and I

think it’s important to note that no way

a parenting is perfect I’ve said this

before in this video but the things that

I say the opinions that I have they are

my own not everyone will believe the

same thing and that’s okay we are all

different every baby’s different every

mama’s different every family is

different and so the things that I

believe in the things that I say aren’t

necessarily the way that you need to do

things anyways I hope you guys enjoy it

I’m gonna try doing more videos like

this some of you have been suggesting

that Christian wife chats things like

that I think that would also be fun to

do so make sure to follow me on

Instagram to ask me questions the next

time I do one of these videos and I’ll

see you in my next video

bye guys

you.

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